It’s been two days since I arrived home from an epic two weeks in France with my sister Lacy leading the Shift retreat, and I’m basking in all I’m grateful for and how changed I feel. In my life there has truly been nothing like travel (okay, maybe motherhood, but that’s a whole different bag) to tune my heart and completely alter my perspective on myself and the world.
It’s been over a week of being sick. Not just me, but my 6-year-old daughter too. Snarfly, snotty, sneezy sick. The kind that makes people look at you and then take two giant steps back.
We’ve been making it on our own one day and one tissue at a time. My husband is away in Texas while his grandfather slowly makes the transition out of his body and back into the Oneness. And honestly, things have felt hard.
It happened again.
But this time I was 15 stories up peering out over miles and miles of shimmering blue waters in front of me. The morning sun was soft and gauzy, and the sounds of the ocean sang a soothing tune that echoed on my heart. I was flowing through yoga poses and carefully twisting my body when the sabotage began yet again.
Today I sat in mediation with tears streaming down my face, and I saw the litany of ways flash before my eyes that I've been beating myself up lately. Big things. Tiny things. Strange little things you wouldn't even imagine.
Like the planter in my window. I tried to start cilantro from seed about a month or two ago, and while three little shoots popped up to say hello, they eventually fizzled and fell. Now the planter is sitting in the window with dried out soil and tiny little cilantro carcasses, and I didn't even realize it was making me feel bad.
Are you a spiritually-centered person who wants to invite more magic into your life but are not sure how to practically do that?
Are you curious about meditation and mystical tools like crystals and oracle cards but could use a little guidance to nudge you along?
Maybe you’re already spiritually connected but always welcome more fun, more community, more ways to experience the magic?
I'm snuggled up in a hotel bed with the covers practically to my chin. (A good hotel bed is seriously one of my happy places.) My kiddo is snoozing soundly on the roll-away at my feet, and my husband is downstairs hopefully winning a million dollars in the casino. (A girl can dream.)
For the moment, all feels peaceful.
We are on an overnight stopover making our way back to the mountains after a week at the beach. And even though it was all sun-soaked and jammed with joy, I am feeling the call of my space and the gentle pull of my nourishing routines.
My heart is full, but my body is honestly drained.
This is a love letter, an anthem.
It began as a gift to myself on this day of my birth. Somewhere along the way it turned into a lullaby to my most precious daughter. And finally it became this collection of sweet nothings for all of us.
So listen, dear one. This is for you...
Your desires are beautiful, and they are right on time. Allow the longings of your heart, and pay attention to them. Dream big.
I'm sitting on the balcony of our coastal condo and I'm staring out at the sparkling blue waters of the sea. Pelicans are chattering noisily to one another as they take turns nose-diving into the water. Small boats laze by, and the lap of the water is lulling me into a quiet, open-eyed meditation.
All is well.
At least it should be.
But I am not completely present. I keep glancing down at the rolls of belly beneath my thin blue tank top, and my mind jumps back and forth between the beer I'd like to have and the exercising I think I probably should be doing. It's a constant assault, and today it's been particularly exhausting.